My glasses have a scratch right in the center of my right lens. I have done all of the google suggestions to remove a scratch, to no avail. If possible, the scratch seems to grow. Of course it is right in the center of my right eye. I have learned to hold my head to one side or up/down a little to see around the scratch, and the part that hinders my vision.
I have put off going to the eye doctor this year because of COVID. Sitting right on top of someone else breathing into my air space and vice versa just does not sound like an exciting idea. But it is getting to the point I need to have my vision checked and get a new pair of glasses.
My 2020 vision has not been superior, to say the least. In fact, I have not had my eyes examined since a couple of weeks before Irma hit on September 10, 2017. All of those suggestions from Terry to make an appointment? Yeah. I am really kicking myself for not making time.
One of the struggles I have faced this year is reading my Bible. I have had my Bible for 26 years now. My parents gave it to me for my 21st birthday. It was falling apart. The cover was tearing away and pages were falling out; the binding was unraveling. Terry and I sent it off a couple of years ago to have it rebound with a new leather cover and I absolutely love it. The markings in it over the years; the highlighted passages with notes in the margins remind me of God’s faithfulness and provision. Plus my Bible is all intact now; stronger than ever.
But the font has shrunk, I’m convinced. It has nothing to do with my vision worsening. I think at night when I’m sleeping, little elves mess with it and shrink it to make the font tee-niny tiny.
Okay, fine. It’s my vision.
When I can’t read the words on the pages, I use my laptop to search the passages, or I read chapter after chapter online.
I do not enjoy this. Not at all. I am a “hold the book in my hands,” kind of girl. I make notes and highlight in every book I read, so my Bible is certainly one that I like to take notes or highlight scripture.
My Bible tells story after story of painful/difficult times in my life.
Time and time again when I did not see a way out, God always led me.
Both my Bible and scratched up glasses that impair my vision, make a great analogy for 2020.
The goodness of God is very much still there … I just have trouble seeing it, sometimes. That’s not on God, though. That’s on my failing vision, or lack of ability to see it.
Boy does that sum up 2020, or what? What a year.
The goodness of God has been there, all along, though. My obstinate vision just struggled to see it. But even through the muck and yuck, I can choose to see His goodness in spite of the bad circumstances.
This was our 2020: Terry and I sold our house in the Keys in January. We didn’t want to move, but we had to do it, when other people who owed money to us did not do the right thing. Terry had been in a business where they did not pay him for almost five years. So we sold our house, moved into the hunting property cabin as a “temporary holding place” while we made travel plans and would figure out where God wants us to live, next.
But COVID happened, so we held off on all of our traveling and house hunting. And we have lived in the cabin that has no cell and very unreliable internet service (even though we pay for it).
We haven’t seen my parents since the end of February and I miss not being able to hug them. I miss our church in the Keys and our precious friends. I miss our old house.
So when friends and loved ones began getting sick with COVID and a couple of them died; perspectives about sadness and disappointments shifted. It is so painful to watch someone you love grieve the life of someone they loved. It makes grieving over our old house and having to move, seem so trivial.
Terry hurt his back and we learned he has four herniated discs. Then, as y’all know, I fell and broke my right hand, and learned I have severe damage and have to have surgery to repair it, and quite frankly, I was having a really difficult time looking through my scratched, hindered vision to see the goodness of God.
This year has been downright difficult for almost all of us. Loved ones died. Jobs and homes were lost. Lonely elders grew lonelier. Family visits ceased. Visiting and hugging loved ones suddenly became a thing of the past. People are suffering with the illness of COVID. Those who already struggle with depression are finding this year to be their most challenging year, yet.
But I know even with my terrible vision, a visit with an eye doctor will supply a new prescription, new lenses and I will see better than ever.
When we keep our eyes and focus on Papa and His great love for us, we know He will supply a new vision and we will see His goodness, better than ever.
“This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.” - Habakkuk 2:3 (NLT)
I know Papa’s vision is for a future time. It will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, let’s all wait patiently. For it will surely take place.
Like my pastor, Jamie George in Franklin used to say, “God is seldom early, but He is never late.”
Praying each of you will have unhindered vision moving into the new year, and I pray great health and God’s sweet blessings on each of you. 2021 might not be the fabulous year we are all hoping for; or maybe it will be? No matter what, let’s keep our vision in check and search every single day for God’s goodness. I promise it will be there, and I promise we will see it.
Terry and I keep seeing the meme that says, “I’m staying up ‘til midnight this New Year’s Eve. Not to welcome in the new year, but to make sure this one leaves.”
That’s us. Happily saying “adios” to 2020, and “Why hello there, sweetheart,” to 2021!