“Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" - Isaiah 6:8 (NIV)
I have been spending more time in Isaiah lately. Partly because I love it so much. Also because Michala was doing a bible study on Isaiah, so I enjoyed the refresher for myself, as well.
One morning when I read the above passage, I could not help but think how eager, how willing, and how gracious to say, “Here am I. Send me!”
Would I be so bold? Would I step forward and volunteer myself and my services upon hearing my Lord’s request? I would love to think yes, absolutely I would. But I also suspect I might look around and sheepishly wonder if maybe someone more experienced could go? Maybe someone far more qualified.
Yes, I know the saying, “God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.” And I believe it. But I think I struggle with believing myself worthy of being the one God could ever use. Do you know why? Because I always imagined big, elaborate gestures. I think I assumed God would one day use me for something, so I waited for the call.
But I really do not know if “the call” ever came. For years I wanted it to be something fancy. Perhaps being an Emmy award winning Food Network host or an elaborate business as a keynote speaker, or a New York Times best-selling author. But as my dreams shifted. I realized a Food Network show was what Aimee wanted for Aimee; not what God wanted for Aimee.
In order for us to say, “Here am I, send me,” we have to be willing to want what God wants, not just what we want.
I also, as a work in progress, realize much of my story is more about the bad things to happen to me, rather than the beautiful redemption given to me. Sometimes, I think we need to clear our throats for a better voice. We are the ones telling our stories and sometimes we need to do a better job at it.
For me, I need to talk less about me and more about Jesus. I need to be willing to go when God is looking to send someone to do His work. Sometimes, His work is far from glamorous. It’s being kind to someone who is really nasty. It is choosing not to engage when someone purposefully insults you. It’s doing the right thing in the quiet moments, not expecting accolades or applause.
God sees everything and He knows our hearts. If we are eager and willing to say, “Here am I, send me,” then we need to be eager and willing to trust where He sends us. I would much rather God send me into a room of loving, gentle people who welcome me with open arms, hugs, laughter and acceptance.
But how do we win other people over for Jesus if we are only loving the people in the seats around us? The call is waiting for us every single day. It is in the uncomfortable we will find Jesus, ready to meet us there and get us through it.
Not only will He get us through it, He will make us better with His strength.