Terry and I were talking to a friend recently and she commented how difficult it had been on her to be around someone who has been so cruel to her, in the past. Our friend tried to extend an olive branch, so to speak, about five or six years ago, to this person who has been so unkind to her. A couple of weeks ago, our friend, in the midst of this pandemic, had to be around these very people again; one being the woman who had been so nasty to our friend, in the past.
Our friend was telling us that this last time she was around the person, things were a little better, but she remains guarded because of how nasty this person has been to her, in the past. We told her we understood, completely, and that she should guard her heart. (Proverbs 4:23) I asked her, “But maybe this is a step toward healing? It is what we have been praying for with you, and maybe God allowed all of this to take place for relationships to be mended?”
Terry and I were sitting in the truck talking to our friend on speaker when it went silent. “Are you still there?” Terry asked her.
“I’m here,” she said, softly. “I just don’t like how all of this has been, and it’s hard always being the one who reaches out.” Terry said, “We know. Aimee and I have been in your very shoes.” We told her we have reached out to some unkind people before, expecting to be met with grace in return for our kindness, only to be met with sheer nastiness.
Terry and I know someone who has gone out of their way to be not just mean to me, but nasty. Vile. Hateful. The sassy southern girl in me says, “I wouldn’t throw my mint julep on her if she caught fire.” The Jesus loving girl in me says, “I know I have to be the one to show kindness in the face of her hate.”
I cannot tell you how many times I wish the southern girl in me would win out over the Jesus loving girl in me, because it would just be so much easier. But then I imagine Jesus standing behind the person who is so nasty to us, and what would His face look like if He saw me being mean, in return?
Sure, I know what you’re thinking. “Well, He would see the nasty person being nasty, first.”
Yep. He would.
But He expects better of me.
Dadgummit, I hate it when Jesus is right and I am wrong. Okay, I do not hate it when Jesus is right. But I do hate it when I am wrong. Which happens an awful lot.
“But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever. I will praise you forever for what you have done; in your name I will hope, for your name is good. I will praise you in the presence of your saints.” - Psalm 52:8-9 (NIV)
God expects His followers to show His love to everyone. (As Bob Goff says, “Everybody Always.”) We are to show His love to His people. And His people are all the people.
Even the jerks.
Our strength comes from God’s unfailing love. As followers of God and lovers of Jesus, we need to be the ones extending the olive branches.
Even when the person we extend them to turns around and smacks us across the face with it, we still need to extend the olive branches, because we are like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God. We trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever. We will praise Him for what He has done; in His name we will hope, for His name is good. We will praise Him in the presence of His saints.
Just remember, the people who are mean/hateful and nasty? They do not have to take our olive branches. Their nastiness is on them.
But the olive branches? We still have to extend them. Because God’s grace is on us.